10 Month Miller Mila- say that five times fast.

Oh hi, how are you? We haven't talked in a while; my mom is so lazy. I heard she just posted a blog from the last two months with barely any captions. She missed my nine month blog. She missed Ava's actual birthday. And Christmas. WHAT KIND OF MOM BLOGGER SKIPS A CHRISTMAS BLOG? Anyway, happy 2014. I'm going to cut her some slack, since I've cut eight thousand teeth and myself, Ava and Mom have been passing the Cold from Hell back and forth for weeks now. Personally, I blame Ava's preschool. Those kids are gross- always sneezing on everything and forgetting to cover their mouths. Uncouth, if you ask me. 

If my mom had been accurately keeping this blog up, you'd know that at my 9 month checkup I'd skyrocketed to the 65th percentile for height (28 inches) and the 60th for weight (19.5 pounds). I've definitely broken the 20 pound barrier by now- my mom says her back can attest.

I'm wearing clothes that Ava wore as an 18 month old, and some of them are a little tight (according to mom; I think these pants fit just right). I'm cruising around all over furniture now, attacking Ava's toys with all my might* and pretty much think I'm going to walk any day now and....oh, hey, what's that over there?

*Attack is the accurate word. Mila throws elbows and pushes Ava out of the way when she wants something, while Ava yells "helppppp!!". Ava hasn't realized that she's bigger. Yet. 

I've seen Dad drink these. But they've been left down here at baby level. So they must be for me. 

Today is the best day ever!

Kate: I can see where this is going and I'm powerless to stop it. Why doesn't anyone ever listen to me? I TOLD Dad to put those away in the fridge last night. 

I'm feeling pretty good. Belly full, pants unbuttoned. Wait, these are baby leggings. I don't have buttons. Even better. 

Maybe just one more, for the road? I'm digging these throwback cans. Totally retbo. I mean retvo. Retro. That's the word. 

Feeling a little woozy. 

I told you so. 

Oh, hi there. Birthdays, Christmas, dog birthdays and more.

You may think I've forgotten about this blog. That would be incorrect. I've just been neglecting it. So here are some of the highlights from the last two months. 

3rd birthday pancakes! Guaranteed to start the special day right- with a huge sugar rush.

And to continue the theme, Ava got to pick out a special treat from the bakery. Totally worth it, when we saw how happy she was :)

Christmas came!

Santa made an appearance, and even left a nice note for the girls.

Dear Ava & Mila,

I heard that you were both good girls this year. Well, mostly. Rumor has it that Mila was placed in Slytherin and Ava got kicked out of the preschool lunch program*. But mostly you were good. Thank you for the cookies and milk. I love you and I'm always watching!

Santa Claus

*Ava has since been reinstated in preschool lunch

Mila turned nine months old and continues to kill us with cuteness. 

Kate turned four years old, and shared a cupcake with Ava. 

And thanked her with sweet kisses for her special treat. 

Mila helped us prepare for our Super Bowl party,

While Ava explored different art mediums.

The cold weather has forced us to get creative with indoor sports, and the girls just missed the mark on making the indoor penguin sled team for Sochi. 

Mom had a blast decorating our new playhouse (thanks Elseners!) that Ava got for her birthday. Ava and Mila love playing hide and seek, although Mila isn't a very good (or quiet) hider. 

Stay tuned for Mila's 10 month blog, coming later today!

Magical Mila

Long ago, in a land far away, like way out in Aurora, Sybil Trelawny had a prophecy. Nattering on about tea dregs and glass balls, she suddenly dropped her pumpkin scone. Her voice deepened unnaturally. "For two girl wizard children shall be borne into a family of muggles. Mostly the dad will be a muggle. The mom will be pretty awesome and magical. Anyway, the first shall be named Ava. She will be willful and walk on the tips of her toes for years, leading to insanely strong calf muscles. She will enjoy bike riding and lining up her toys in orderly rows, and eat three bananas a day. Two years later, another child shall follow, this one named Mila. She shall be tall and stout and smile at every person she meets. Her double chins will bring nations to their knees. The smell of her gas will cause her mother to gag. So mote it be". Sybil Trelawny shook herself as her voice returned to normal. "Now who wants to make a Chipotle run?", she asked. "I'm starving". 

-Modern Day-

Hi. I'm Mila. I just finished reading the Harry Potter  series and the comparisons to my life are....uncanny. When I woke up from my (20-minute) nap this afternoon, Mom chronicled my adventures. 

Yes. Why do you look so surprised? Not everyone can be a goody-two-shoes Gryffindor and, frankly, I think the Sorting Hat made a major mistake when they placed Ava in the Big G house. I mean, have you met her? She's scared of her own shadow. And our credo?

Or perhaps in Slytherin,

You'll make your friends. 

Those cunning folk use any means,

To achieve their ends. 

Sound like any almost-three-year-old you know? Plus, also, I'm totally the cutest one in house. 

And, like most 8-month olds, I speak Parseltongue, so there's that. 

Psssss-thsakjs-looooth--sssssssa

"I peed my pants"

Now let's try some spells!

These toy animals are ok, I guess. They're just really tiny, even for a miniature person like me. They need to be....at least....three times this size! 

*Boom, I threw a Zoolander reference in there*

Engorgio!!!

It worked. I can't believe it actually worked. 

Hmph. What am I going to do with one gold galleon? I can't buy a lifetime supply of pacifiers and hair gel with this. 

GEMINIO! (Oh yes, Mila knows the multiplying spell, which she had to look up on Wikipedia)

I'm just checking the authenticity of these galleons. You can't be too careful these days. I hear Gringotts had a break-in. Not that I'd know anything about that...

Boy, I'm sure enjoying sitting on the couch. I'm up high, mom's down low. But...I feel so lonely. Ava's napping. If only I had someone to keep me company up here. I feel a strange presence, though. Almost like someone is shielding herself from me. I smell horrific gas and puppy breath....

Homenum Revelio! 

I'm never far, Mila. I'm always waiting for a spare puff to drop from your lap, or mango juice to drip from your chin. My precious....

*Boom, slipped a Hobbit reference in, too*.

True to my Slytherin tendencies, I'm feeling a little destructive. 

Diffindo!

I feel like I'm making up spells just for the sake of it now! Almost like someone made a list and set me up to carry out her wishes. But it couldn't be. No one would dare incur the wrath of The Chosen One (or Two). It may be time to wrap this up. 

I bid you adieu, fair Muggles. Myself and my hippogriff must be off. I have a feeling one day I'll be back, this time united with my sister as we face a Wizarding challenge. Like potty training. 

Until then, feast your eyes on these chubby cheeks which are magically delicious. 

The End. 

P.S.- I'm 8 months old and awesome.

Seven Month....Snow?! And Silliness. Mostly silliness.

Seven months ago right now I didn't know (or care) what the weather was. You could have told me it was raining gold coins and I would have growled in your face like a rabid chipmunk. Luckily seven months later we're all nice and happy and warm and sane while we watch the first snowfall of the season. And we have a seven month old baby. How did this happen??

Lauren: Mila, you're awesome. Why are you so awesome?

Mila: It runs in the family. 

Ava (whispers): Yes, keep playing them like a fiddle. They eat that right up. 

Mila: What's a fiddle? 

Lauren: Ok, so let's talk about something. You look 100% like your dad and 0% like me. Do you know what I went through to get you here? Does the term "multiple failed epidurals" mean anything to you?

Mila: Do you see these dimples? And this round adorable face? Check yourself before you wreck yourself, mama. 

Lauren: Fair enough. 

Lauren: Hi Ava.

Ava: Catch me if you can! There are barely cameras fast enough in the world to capture me! 

Lauren: I know. It's been a really long time since I've gotten a picture of you sitting still. 

Ava: Yeah, because I'm not boring. I'm carpe-ing the diem every day. 

Lauren: How do you know the term carpe diem? 

Ava: You left Dead Poet's Society on the tube when you went to put Ava down for a nap. I'm sucking the marrow out of life. 

Lauren: (sigh)

Mila: Mom, can you open these puffs? 

Lauren: Yes, I can. Use your manners and say "please". 

Mila: Tallyho old girl. These teeth need to chomp on something, and we've got a nursing session coming up. Capisce?

Lauren: And how did you learn Italian, young lady? 

Mila: I'm a savant. 

Mila: Ava told me about this thing called "Thanksgiving" and that it's coming up. 

Lauren: Yes! I'm really excited for you to experience your first Thanksgiving with our family! Our family is awesome and they're going to eat you up. 

Mila: What do you mean, "eat me up"? Are they cannibals? (starts to cry)

Lauren: No, like they just want to kiss your chubby cheeks and make you laugh! 

Mila: Oh, that sounds ok then. 

Ava: Mila, at my first Thanksgiving I really showed them who was boss. This guy called Santa came the day after Thanksgiving and I almost made him cry. I wouldn't let anyone touch me and then stayed up all night. It was awesome. 

Mila: That sounds exhausting. Why don't we just snuggle and coo and giggle and then sleep for 12 straight hours, knocked out with vicarious turkey tryptophan? 

Lauren: I like this train of thought. Keep it going. 

Ava: Here, taste this coffee and tell me about how you want to relax. 

*don't worry, there was no coffee in that pot and it wasn't hot, Mom*

Mila: What is this sweet nectar of the gods? 

Ava: It's called go-go juice, Mila. An essential part of every girl's diet. 

Lauren: Preach. 

Mila: What's this white stuff? 

Lauren: Welcome to winter in Chicago, Mila. 

Mila: Can I eat it? 

Ava: Yes, especially the yellow snow. It's delicious. 

Lauren: Ava Grace- stop trying to trick your sister. 

Ava: Sorry, sorry mama. Just kidding Mila. It's not delicious, it's REALLY delicious. 

Kate: Here Mila, let me help you clean that puff residue off your hands. And do I detect a hint of spinach and potatoes from lunch? 

Mila: Yeah, that was a fun poop. 

Mila rounded out her seven-monthday by watching Ava bake cupcakes. A fun time was had by all. The End. 

Six Month Situation

Oh six months, where have you gone? Well actually, I know. You disappeared under a mountain of diapers, sleepless nights, sweet baby snuggles, teething, sister outings, fun photo shoots and approximately 82,365 kisses. 

Mila continues to fill our lives with laughter. Last week we had a photographer to the house to take her Christening pictures. From where I was sitting, it looked like every picture was perfect (um, obviously). Before he left he looked at me, raised his eyebrows and said, "You have a really good baby". He'd already been paid so I know he was serious ;)

Mila's practicing sitting (she's not very good yet). That may be partly our fault. All she has to do is smile that chubby smile at us and she gets picked up and carried wherever she wants to go. A wee puppetmaster. 

Baby Gap jeggings. I mean, are you serious? 

Mila kindly demonstrated her "I'm pooping my pants" face (and skills) during the photo shoot. 

After a quick pants-change, we tried on a new hat. Leopard print baby berets. I just can't...

It was a short-lived experiment.

We've had some fussier-than-usual episodes lately, mainly because her two little bottom teeth are starting to poke through. Above, Mila models her latest obsession- frozen bananas that she teethes on through a mesh bag. One day, I'm going to come up with one of these simple yet effective baby solutions and make my first billion. 

One last picture of Mila's very first ever pigtails. Hip hip HOORAY that we're entering pigtail territory! 

Six month stats: 

Weight: 14 pounds, 7 ounces (21st percentile)

Height: I can't remember but I know it was the 61st percentile. Mother of the Year, right here. 

Sleep: Still getting up 2-3 times a night to eat, but she goes to bed at 6 which is a bonus. I wonder if I'll ever get a straight eight hours of sleep a night in my life ever again. One can dream, literally. 

Favorite foods: sweet potatoes, squash, frozen bananas and prunes (which is everything she's tried. She's a good eater)

Skills: Scooting, rolling, supported sitting, cooing, belly laughs

I asked Art if there was anything he wanted to add to tonight's blog. He replied, "that she's the best and sweetest baby of all time". Yep.